timshel

apologies in advance. i am still not able to collect my thoughts sufficiently to pontificate on the subjects i noted in my last post as urgently needing to discuss. so much for placeholders. seems silly to reach back two weeks in time to talk about any of those significant occurrences and the implications thereof. also there has been so much delightful forward movement in my life of late that i don't want to disrupt it by reaching back*. i am in northern california at the moment. and, as usual, am struck by the land. hence the reference to steinbeck in the subject. my understanding of the hebrew word timshel comes from steinbeck's east of eden. the pertinent passage, in part, is as follows:

"[T]his was the gold from our mining: 'Thou mayest.' The American Standard translation orders men to triumph over sin (and you can call sin ignorance). The King James translation makes a promise in 'Thou shalt,' meaning that men will surely triumph over sin. But the Hebrew word timshel—'Thou mayest'—that gives a choice. For if 'Thou mayest'—it is also true that 'Thou mayest not.'"

there is so much in that one little world - individual responsibility and the invention of conscience. and then some. free will and the capacity to forge our own moral destinies. hope. redemption. opportunity. yearning.

the novel is also a lovesong for this land. the descriptions of the salinas valley are so rich and vibrant you cannot help but appreciate the rugged beauty in this part of the world. steinbeck apparently wrote the novel for his two sons, so that they could know the land as he knew it, when he knew it - early 20th century. he also apparently considered it his greatest work. he said of east of eden, "It has everything in it I have been able to learn about my craft or profession in all these years." he further claimed: "I think everything else I have written has been, in a sense, practice for this." anyway, it's a great work. so i often recall it when i come to northern california, and then recall timshel. here endth my sixth grade book report for this blog.

i have been embracing the beauty of timshel of late. perhaps even more than usual. i have also been surprised by joy. more on all of that later, or not. i am feeling less inclined to share things in this space at the moment and simply appreciate them in private. once the whirlwinds of these weeks calm down and something remarkable occurs (or does not), perhaps i'll be inspired to resume. i mayest, after all. or i mayest not. xx

*and yet as i write that, i think of the closing lines of the great gatsby - "and so we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past". not that it is related. although i think somewhere deep down we all believe in the green light.